How Certain Personality Types Butter Their Toast And What It Says About Each

Buttered toast. Quick and easy snack, breakfast side, for some it's a whole breakfast. All 3 work as ways to describe buttered toast. End of article, right? Wrong. I've got 300+ words to write, and we're going to get there together. How could this guy get 300+ words about toast? We can thank Darren Stanton, a psychologist from England, who found that certain personality types butter their toast differently. Darren broke the research down into nine different types of butter spreaders. Nine?! We're going to go through a couple of the spread types here.

Starting with what I'd consider myself, they call it the glider. You glide the knife across to spread the butter evenly over the toast. Darren said these people are easygoing. Checks out. I might almost fall into the Total Coverage spreader, but that's just because the glider doesn't seem like enough butter. Now let's take a look at some of the other more absurd categories of bread buttering. I say absurd because if you know anyone with a personality type that butters their toast this way you should re-evaluate the amount of time you spend with them.

The Clumper

Darren says: You think outside the box... and tend to be late.

Steve says: Are you kidding me? That's how my 4 year old puts butter on his toast. This is the reason he doesn't get to butter his toast anymore. How hungry are you that you can't move the butter around a bit more? You could even let it melt for 30 more seconds and it would at least drip onto other spots so you're not biting into a chunk of butter in 1 bite and no butter the next bite. Call this person less.

The Double Sider

Darren says: You're creative, live by your own rules, and don't mind being the weird one.

Steve says: Everything in your kitchen has greasy fingerprints on it. How do I know? because I have children who can't eat toast without getting butter on their hands. I'll be walking past the steps and notice a streak on the wall from a small hand walking up or down the steps. Chances are your phone screen is glazed in butter grease.

The Curler (use a butter curler)

Darren says: You're smug.

Steve says: I agree with Darren. Use a butter knife. You're not better than us. Your butter is going to melt the same way ours is and we still have the $10 to waste on something worthwhile. Like a pasta cutter wheel!

For the full article and photos of the nine ways different personality types butter their toast go here: Butter that Bread!

FYI - 438 words.

A YouTube channel, Mythical Kitchen, featured Jason Kelce on an episode of a series called Last Meals. He chose a few "Philly Things" we'd like to highlight.

Last Meals is a series in which prolific people (e.g. Tom Hanks, Post Malone, and John Boyega) decide what they would eat for their hypothetical "last meal." Then, Mythical Chef Josh takes to the kitchen (or the store) to create a multi-course meal to bid a fictional farewell to the celebrity guest. As they eat, Chef Josh asks the guests questions about things they have going on currently, as well as hypotheticals about death and dying.

The show had Jason Kelce on as a guest promoting his podcast with his brother, Travis Kelce, New Heights.

Kelce requested a variety of food items for his last meal. Some highlights of his meal include a PB & J, beans with hotdogs and Skyline Chili dip. He's a normal guy that likes normal food. Our favorite parts of the episode, though, are when he breaks out the Philadelphia foods. He has totally embraced the city and its lifestyle, and we could not be any more here for it.

He's a family man who is down to Earth and kind to all. This was a genuine delight to watch. The video, about a traditionally morbid subject, feels light and fun. Kelce reminisces on childhood memories and has a lot of lovely things to say about Philly and his wife, Kylie. it was a delight to watch him dig into his hypothetical "last meal" on the show.

The team at Mythical Kitchen had the cheesesteak delivered on dry ice so as to preserve it for its long journey. They heated it up to the best of their ability for Jason and Chef Josh to enjoy. Jason Kelce told Chef Josh that he used to be a big Tony Luke's fan, as that is the shop closest to the stadium in South Philly. That was, until he met his wife and moved out to Delco. She introduced him to the world of Dalessandro's, and the rest is history.

Being from Ohio originally, you wouldn't think Jason would even know what Stock's Bakery is, let alone how magical their pound cake is. Again, though, he has his wife, Kylie Kelce to thank. He loved the pound cake so much, he had to include it in his "last meal."

If you know, you know. Swiacki Meats is a Polish Phialdelphia tradition that dates back to 1953. Jason Kelce's father-in-law introduced him to the magic of the Kabonosy from Swiacki. He featured that in a variety of flavors in this multi-course meal.

If you want to see the full episode, here it is! He makes loads of mentions of Delco, Philly foods, and shares some heartfelt sentiments. It's a really pleasant video about a rather morbid subject.